A
hug is a near universal form of act/reaction or be an expression of
feelings (such as close
friendship,
love,
) which people have for one another. in which two people put their
arms
around the neck, back, or waist of one another and hold each other
closely. If more than two persons are involved, this is referred to as a
group hug.
Cuddling is a related form of physical intimacy
in which two people hold one another with each person's arms wrapped
around the others body. Similar to hugging, cuddling is a more
affectionate and intimate embrace, normally done for a longer period of
time. Cuddling is usually shared between two people who are lying down together or sitting somewhere in an intimate manner.
Step 1: Intention
Firstly, it is important not to let your hugee get caught off guard.
Don’t just run up to someone and hug them without letting them know your
intention as this will come across as if you’re about to grope them.
They may feel you’re going for their undies and not realize you’re
hugging them.
Instead, open up your body with your hands about 20cm apart, ensure
your right-hand is higher than your left-hand and lean back slightly. In
doing so you may initially look like you are about to perform some
Euro-techno robot dance, but rest assured that the hugee will see that
you’re approaching them to hug, and not to dance.
Step 2: Your Head
Tilt your head to the left, letting your hugee know where you’re
going otherwise you could both end up approaching each other and
accidentally kissing. We wouldn’t want a situation where you re-enact a
scene from Brokeback Mountain.
Step 3: Embrace
Step in towards your fellow man, your right-hand will go over their shoulders, with your head going to the left of theirs.
Your measure of sincerity is shown by you firmly gripping them into your hands.
If you fail to firmly grip, you’ll end up in a floppy, half-hearted
attempt that will make you look like a retard at a hugging convention.
Keep your head straight, facing forward.
WARNING: If you look down or incline towards your hugee, this may seem inappropriate and look like you’re smooching.
Step 4: How long do I hug?
The hugging timeline depends on how comfortable you are, but
realistically, a second or two is fine. If it’s a family member or a
best friend, it may be much longer. However, be careful. Staying longer
in this compromising position may make you uncomfortable and catch the
eye of girls passing by, meaning that, instead of thinking you’re cool,
they would think you swing the other way.
Step 5: Making the embrace a ‘Man-Hug’
At the moment you probably feel as though this hug is as camp as an
Elton John on pills. But don’t worry, what makes the hug ‘man-ly’ is the
Pat. The pat is the most crucial part and separates the boys from the
men. Lift your right hand up (not like you’re hailing Hitler) and firmly
pat the back of your hugee. This shows you’re a man, and the harder you
pat, the more masculine you are.
Step 6: Step back
You’ve now completed the man hug. But knowing how to complete your
step back is important. After patting your hugee three or four times,
smartly move away, lifting your hands and stepping back.
WARNING: Do not slide your arms slowly across your
hugee’s body or arms in a lethargic manner, otherwise you will leave
your friends confused as to your hugging intentions. If this occurs, and
you cannot avoid it, RUN!
Step 7: Finishing off
You have now completed the first 6 steps of the perfect man hug. But
to end this in the most appropriate manner, don’t cough, scratch
yourself or look scared after hugging. Instead, say something that
corresponds with why you hugged like ‘how are you?’, ‘great to see you’,
or ‘hey dude, how’s things?’
Well done! You have done it. You’re still a man, and you’ve
performed a hug showing your feminine side. You are the beast of the 21st century. You are the gladiator of the world. You’re the Dude.
