Moments of Married Love… The Untold Story - Prophet Muhammad's Wives

Prophet Muhammad's Wives

Aisha bint Abi Bakr

Moments of Married Love… The Untold Story

Prophet Muhammad & Lady Aishah

The Prophet and his beloved Aishah connected as soul mates, 

as he received divine revelations often when he was with her.

We all have a certain image of lovers, a star-crossed pair, love at first sight, living happily ever after… Normally, we associate these ideas of love with couples who meet, date, and fall head over heels for each other. Very rarely do we relate these images to married couples.

Moreover, we almost never connect this perception to Muslim couples, who marry according to purely Islamic customs. Although this link is quite rare, there actually exists an example in Islam's own history, which not only depicts this kind of love but goes far beyond it.

This is the pure, married love between the Prophet Muhammad and his beloved, Lady Aishah.

The two came together in circumstances that are a stark contrast to today's conventional love story. He was a devoted Messenger of God, embarking on the third year of prophethood; she was the daughter of his best friend and companion, Abu Bakr.

Infusing Romance

The early years of their marriage began quite innocently. Although Aishah was a young bride, she was in the standard marriageable age that the Arabian culture approved of and encourages at that time.

Though Aishah was ready for marriage life, the Prophet preferred to grant her extra support in her transition to life as a married woman. She carried on with the many joys of childhood and fortunate for her, as she had a husband gentle and kind enough to understand this.

Rather than throwing all the responsibilities of a wife on her at once, the Prophet made the marriage and its duties a gradual process for Aishah and ensured that she made a smooth transition into her new life. The compassionate nature with which he nurtured Aishah in her early years as a wife made a tremendous impact on the strong woman she went on to become.

As the so called "honeymoon period" between the couple came to an end, many challenges and trying moments began to arise. In the midst of all the mayhem, this blessed couple still took time out for simple fun and laughter.

Aishah fondly recalls memories of racing with the Prophet and even winning the race when she was young and fit. They enjoyed these races so much that the couple even raced to the Battle of Badr which was one of the most important battles in the Islamic history.

The romance in the Prophet's marriage was not limited to just fun and games. As their marriage continued, intimacy was ultimately inter-woven in their daily affairs. They would sit and eat together and Aishah would take a sip and then the Prophet would do so from the same spot her lips touched.

She would have some meat or chicken, and then he would eat from the same spot she ate from. This is just one of many ways they infused romance and affection in even the simplest of acts. These small gestures show that in this marriage, romance was not a superficial bouquet of roses. Rather, it was natural and existed in their everyday life.

Love has several expressions. However, it is known to all and sundry that for a woman, nothing expresses love like the words a man simply speaks from his heart.

The Prophet was most forthcoming in expressing his love for Aishah and this is evident in multiple sayings (hadith) in which he publicly declares that Aishah is the most beloved to him.

Such profound love he held for his wife that he referred to her as one with the complete qualities of a believing woman. This is a clear sign of the kind of respect he held for his wife.

This respect was possible because he actually put forth the time and effort in getting to know and understand his wife enough to recommend her as an example for other women to follow.

Brilliant Student & Great Teacher

Sent as a teacher to mankind, 
the Prophet implemented this role most effectively

A crucial dimension to their equation was the student-teacher relationship they shared. Aishah's enthusiastic and inquisitive nature made her one of the foremost students of the Prophet.

Sent as a teacher to mankind, the Prophet implemented this role most effectively in his very own home. The Islamic virtues and way of life Aishah learned and carried out were essentially through watching the Prophet and keenly observing his behavior and mannerisms.

He led by example and his beloved wife testifies to this in stating that the manners of the prophet were a living example of the Quran.

Far from being meek and oppressed, Aishah was a woman of substance who was never afraid to stand up for truth and justice — whether that meant defending herself or her beloved husband. She participated in battles when she was able to and played whatever role she could in supporting the Prophet in his endeavors.

Surviving Hardships

Her quality of being content regardless of circumstances helped her overcome many challenges she faced as the Prophet's wife. There was a time in the Prophet's home, when they had no fire or food for cooking and they simply lived off of dates and water. Yet Aishah went through this hardship and showed the mark of a true companion — one who can offer unrelenting support even under the most trying circumstances.

A truly dynamic woman, complete with the qualities of virtue, intelligence and even possessiveness over her husband — there was something quite distinct about Aishah which drew the Prophet so close to her.

Passing On Her Husband's Legacy

It was after the Prophet's demise that one can truly see 
the divine purpose behind this marriage

The Prophet and his beloved Aishah connected as soul mates, as he received divine revelations often when he was with her. The fact that God blessed and ordained this marriage is evident in that the Prophet confessed to Aishah that before marrying her, he saw her twice in his dreams.

Both times, Angel Gabriel carried her to him in a silk cloth and said to him, that Aishah would be his wife in this world and in the Hereafter. Their blessed companionship came to a peaceful end after nine years, when the Prophet drew his last breath in Aishah's arms.

The Prophet's demise may have ended their companionship in this world. However, it did not put a stop to his mission nor did it end Aishah's role in carrying out her beloved's message.

It was after the Prophet's demise that one can truly see the divine purpose behind this marriage. Because she spent the most formative years of her life with the Prophet, she was able to learn and imbibe all of his teachings.

This became a tremendous asset after the Messenger passed away and was only possible because of Aishah's age. Upon his demise, Aishah's youth gave her the capacity to continue to preach Islam's message for the many years she lived thereafter.

Many companions of the Prophet and new followers of Islam would come to Lady Aishah for advice on various Islamic matters. Her contribution in relating numerous sayings of the Prophet and providing clarification on questions related to faith soon catapulted her to the status of a prominent Islamic scholar.

Aishah's role in this marriage was one that God destined in order to ensure that the teachings of Islam will be successfully transmitted to coming generations even after the Prophet passed away.

The love story between the Prophet Muhammad and Lady Aishah may not be what epic romances are made of, but it certainly provides a more realistic perception of how true love can be found within a marriage.

The sole purpose of marriage in Islam is to fulfill an individual's need for companionship and true love. Islam emphasizes and encourages this fulfillment but only within the bond of marriage.

The Prophet's marriage to Aishah shows that intimacy and romance is not necessarily limited to rosy-eyed young dating couples. This blessed couple exemplified that the true love and companionship we all seek, is entirely possible within marriage and moreover, within the Islamic way of life.

Today, this is a marriage which many may choose to slander or demean. Yet one needs only to take a look at the evidence Prophet Muhammad and Lady Aishah left behind, in the form of numerous sayings they related, which testify so dearly to the love and intimacy they shared.

The most famous love stories in this world are those that were a figment of someone's imagination. Yet this is a love which actually existed. It was a love created and destined by God himself.

Source: http://onislam.net

The Obligatory Nature of Hajj

The Obligatory Nature of Hajj

The advent of the month of Shawwāl brings with it the remembrance of Ibrāhīm ‘alayhis salām and his memorable hajj. All over the world, those who are fortunate make preparations for this great spiritual experience. Hajj is from the five pillars of Islām and is fard upon every sane and mature believer who possesses the means to perform hajj.

Allāh ta‘ālā mentions in the Glorious Qur’ān: 

 “…As a right of Allāh, it is obligatory on the people to perform hajj of the House – on everyone who has the ability to manage (his) way to it.” (3:97)

The Prophet sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam has said:

“Islām is founded on five (pillars): 

bearing witness that there is no deity except Allāh and that Muhammad is the Messenger of Allāh,

establishing salāh, 

paying zakāh, 

performing hajj and 

fasting in the month of Ramadān.” (Al-Bukhārī)

In another hadīth, he said: “O people! Indeed Allāh, the Mighty, the Exalted has made hajj obligatory upon you; therefore perform hajj.” (Ahmad)

Virtues of Hajj

The Prophet sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam has mentioned many virtues of hajj, encouraging the believers to fulfil this obligation:

“The performers of hajj and ‘umrah are deputations of Allāh. If they call Him, He answers them; and if they seek His forgiveness, He forgives them.” (Ibn Mājah)

“There is no reward for an accepted hajj except Jannah.” (Al-Bukhārī, Muslim)

“Whoever performs hajj for the sake of pleasing Allāh, and therein utters no word of evil, nor commits any evil deed, shall return from it free from sin as the day on which his mother gave birth to him.” (Al-Bukhārī, Muslim)

The performer of hajj becomes so pure that even that person is forgiven for whom he seeks forgiveness. The Prophet sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam said:

“When you meet a Hajī (on his way home), then greet him, shake hands with him and ask him to beg forgiveness of Allāh on your behalf before he enters his home, for his prayer for forgiveness is accepted since he is forgiven by Allāh.” (Ahmad)

Warnings for Non-performance of Hajj

The Prophet sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam has also warned those who do not fulfil this obligation despite it becoming obligatory upon them:

“He who possesses enough provisions which will suffice for him to reach the House of Allāh, and he does not perform hajj, then there is no care whether he dies as a Jew or a Christian.” (At-Tirmidhī)

Hajj is fard upon every sane, adult and healthy Muslim, when he has sufficient wealth to enable him to travel to and from the Ka‘bah. This will apply when the wealth required to take him is in excess of his needs (such as house, transport, clothing, etc.). He also needs to have sufficient wealth to leave behind for the needs of those who are dependent on him. Furthermore, the journey needs to be a safe one and a woman needs to be travelling with a mahram. As can be understood from the great virtues and stern warnings above, a person upon whom hajj is fard should endeavour to perform hajj at the earliest possible opportunity – this year. The Prophet sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam has said:

“The one who intends to go for hajj should hurry; for sometimes he can get ill, his conveyance can go missing or some other obstacle may arise (which will hinder him from travelling).” (Ahmad)

Misconceptions and Lame Excuses

Many people delay the performance of hajj due to misconceptions which become lame excuses for not performing hajj. Inshā’allāh, I wish to clarify a few of these misunderstandings, so that those who find themselves in these situations can repent and make preparations immediately.

• Many people have enough wealth for them to go for hajj, but they wait to accrue enough wealth so that their spouse can also accompany them. If the husband has enough wealth then he should go for hajj immediately. And if the wife has enough wealth, and she has other mahārim with whom she can go for hajj, then she should go immediately too. The Sharī‘ah does not give either permission to postpone the hajj and wait for the other.

• Many people think that it is necessary that they make arrangements for their parents to perform hajj before they do. This too is incorrect in light of the Sharī‘ah. Undoubtedly, to make one’s parents perform hajj is a great virtue and honour; however, if hajj is not fard on them, but it is fard upon the children, then they should not concern themselves with their parents’ hajj at this moment and fulfil their own obligation. It is possible that in the children waiting for the parents - or in the case of the husband waiting for the wife or vice versa - the one upon whom hajj is fard passes away and is questioned by Allāh ta‘ālā for its non-fulfilment.

• Others delay embarking on the journey until certain worldly tasks have been completed. Remember! The targets of the world will never end. If it is one worldly target that is the excuse this year, then it will be another next year. The Prophet sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam has said: 

“No servant leaves hajj for some worldly objective but that he will see the people returning from hajj before his worldly objective is fulfilled.” (At-Tabrānī)

Therefore, one should put aside any worldly goals he has in mind and fulfil the obligation of Allāh ta‘ālā first. It is also noteworthy to remember that it is from the ploys of Shaytān that he will never say, ‘Don’t perform hajj’, rather, he will make you defer its performance, year after year, until it’s too late.

• Similarly, many delay their hajj because of this hadīth:

“He who performs forty salāh in my masjid in such a way that he does not miss a single salāh, then Allāh prescribes his freedom from the Fire of Jahannam, freedom from punishment and freedom from hypocrisy.” (Ahmad) 

Many think that it is necessary to perform forty salāh in Al-Masjid An-Nabawī, and some have the desire and greed for this virtue, so they delay their performance of hajj as they cannot spare enough time or money to stay in Al-Madīnah for the duration of forty salāh. Hajj is for five days only, and it becomes fard upon that person who can only afford to go for the minimum time. The inability to travel to Al-Madīnah will not be a valid excuse not to perform hajj. Of course, after reaching so close to the blessed city of Al-Madīnah, one should endeavour to at least spend a day in the blessed city and visit Al-Masjid An-Nabawī, and present himself in the Court of Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam.

• Some believe that if their children have reached a marriageable age and are not yet married, then the parents cannot perform hajj until the children are married. This too has no basis whatsoever in the Sharī‘ah. 

• Some delay in travelling as they have small children at home. Once hajj becomes fard, they should seek suitable relatives, friends, etc. who can look after their children whilst they go for hajj; and they need not travel for long due to their circumstance and situation.

• Some delay their hajj as they think it is better to perform it in their old age closer to their death! This is a fallacy as they have no guarantee for how long they will live, and this idea is in complete contrast to the command of the Prophet sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam to perform hajj at the earliest opportunity.

• Some delay performing the hajj as they only obtain a set number of days off work, and they postpone their journey hoping that they may get more days off next year and can spend more time in the Al-Haramayn. This too is not a valid Shar‘ī reason to postpone the hajj. They should go and spend whatever time they have available and absolve themselves of the obligation of hajj.

• Some delay the hajj, as they cannot afford to buy gifts for people, thus deferring their obligation until they have enough money that they can buy gifts for their loved and dear ones. This again is not a valid Shar‘ī excuse.

• Some delay in going for hajj as they cannot afford the ‘five star’, ‘deluxe’ or ‘golden’ package. From a Shar‘ī point of view, as soon as they can afford the cheapest most basic package, hajj becomes fard upon them.

• Others can afford a package, but as the package includes a hotel which is far from the Al-Haram, they are not able to read all five salāh in Al-Haram. This does not justify delaying the hajj. Remember, as long as the five days of hajj are part of the package, hajj will be fard upon them. 

• Some do not go for hajj on the pretext that they are not yet ready to change their lives. Such a thought is from Shaytān. Do we think the same when it comes to reading salāh or paying zakāh? And if this is the case, then change your life, for it is obligatory anyway! Moreover, inshā’allāh, through the barakah of hajj, the life will change for the better. Some go to the other extreme and have resolved to change their lives, but make comments such as, ‘My Īmān is not yet strong enough and I need to build on my Īmān.’ This thought too is from Shaytān. Hajj is a very important fundamental which helps to make one’s Īmān stronger.

Shaykh Muftī ‘Abdur Rahīm Lājpūrī rahimahullāh mentions with regards the permissible reasons for postponing hajj:

The following are reasons for which hajj may be postponed:

• Becoming bankrupt.

• Fear of a tyrannical leader.

• Being imprisoned.

• An unsafe journey.

• Illness because of which the person cannot travel.

• For a woman not to have a mahram or husband to accompany her.

• For a woman to be sitting in her ‘iddah.

He further states that although these factors justify postponing hajj; however, it will be compulsory to proceed with the journey as soon as they no longer exist.

Therefore, it is my heartfelt plea to those upon whom hajj is fard, that they embark on this blessed journey this very year. They should have trust in Allāh ta‘ālā for all their affairs and fulfil this obligation. 

May Allāh ta‘ālā remove all difficulties and hurdles that anyone may have and make hajj easy for one and all. 

Āmīn.

By Shaykh Mawlānā Muhammad Saleem Dhorat hafizahullāh

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