Lady Khadijah … The Unsung Heroine
The simplicity of Khadijah's example is something that cannot
pass unnoticed not only by Muslim women but by non-Muslims as well.
Lady Khadijah is a woman who we have many fruitful lessons
to learn from. There are different aspects of her character that each
need a multivolume book to write, let alone a small article.
Her life was rich with moral lessons from which today's
husbands and wives irrespective of their race, faith and geographical locations
are in dire need to adopt and embrace. Her life before adopting Islam was also
an exemplar to follow and her lifestyle was of that kind women in the 21st
century ought to imitate.
Her upright character made the people of her clan call her
at-Tahirah; an Arabic adjective meaning the 'chaste' or the 'pure'. Her
morals as a widow were much more admired by the men of her clan, and her
business was the talk of the town.
Admirable Business woman
Khadijah was a highly respectable business woman in her
clan. She was a very wealthy lady, and all the people of her clan were keen to
marry her because of her family status and thriving business; a fact she was
clever enough to realize, and hence she never succumbed to their material
wishes.
In other words, she was wise enough to know her qualities
and hence was better able to choose her suitable match away from any clannish
pressure. Due to her inability as a single woman to travel long distances on
her own in the desert trading in her properties, Khadijah used to hire men from
her clan to trade in her business and to travel with her trading caravans to
the Levant; purchasing and selling different commodities.
At that time, Muhammad (peace be upon him) was known for
his honesty and truthfulness among the whole clan, and these good manners were
the main reasons behind Khadijah's decision to hire him to trade in her
business, and later on to choose him as a husband and a soul mate.
Indeed, the thriving business of lady Khadijah and her
strategic planning in hiring the right man to trade in her business is an
eternal lesson from which modern women ought to imitate in the course of their
tired attempts in finding women champions from whose examples and rich
experiences many lessons can be drawn.
The simplicity of Khadijah's example is something that
cannot pass unnoticed not only by Muslim women but by non-Muslims as well.
It Began with Business and Ended up in Marriage
It is no wonder after all to see Khadijah talking to her
lady friend,
Nafisah, about her interest in Muhammad.
Khadijah offered Muhammad a job to trade in her business on
her behalf. Muhammad, on his part, showed remarkable success in his new job
because of the transparency he adopted in his trading job with the business
lady, and his experience in the field as a tradesman who successfully led many
business trips to the Levant.
In her business trips, Khajidah appointed Maysarah (one of
her servants) as an assistant to Muhammad in his new job, and through talking
to her servant, she was assured of Muhammad's transparency and honesty in
handling her business.
It is no wonder after all to see Khadijah talking to her
lady friend, Nafisah, about her interest in Muhammad. Nafisah went straight to
the Prophet and implicitly mentioned lady Khadijah. The Prophet got so
interested and decided to ask for her hand in marriage.
Now, the prestigious and high-born lady is offering
herself in marriage after she became pretty sure that this person she is
proposing to marry will never think of her as a rich businesswoman, but as a
woman worthy of company and warm marriage relationship.
It is an aspect of Khadijah's character worthy of
contemplation and remembrance. It is a moral lesson for both non-Muslims and
new Muslims to learn from and adopt in their daily lives. A very prestigious
lady offering to marry a man who once used to trade in her business after she
has tested his manners and character. What a moral lesson worthy of contemplation
in today's life where marriages have turned into business deals and where real
love is becoming rare.
Once she found her perfect match, Khadijah was not
hesitant to offer herself and unfold her love in a dignified manner that,
although was not quite common among her people, but still it was very
respectable.
The happy couple, Muhammad and Khadijah, concluded the
marriage ceremony and it has been narrated that Muhammad offered Khadijah a
dowry worthy of her respectable status in that time. The happy couple moved
forward until a turning point in their lives took place.
Indeed, Muhammad-Khadijah's marriage here is a telling
example on its own of how far Islam empowers women to select their suitable
matches while being free from any family pressure and worn-out traditions that
in many times stand as stumbling blocks in the face of happy marriages.
Here, Khadijah chose her 'Mr. Right' on her own using
sound criteria that although somewhat driven by human inclinations but yet has
its undeniable and fair share of a marriage choice that is mainly based on
reason and rationale. Selecting her partner herself is an experience girls in
21st century can benefit from once they apply the same rules their head figure
Khadijah once followed.
Khadijah: The First Female Muslim
his beloved wife Khadijah comforted and
reassured him when he returned home
reassured him when he returned home
Fifteen years after their marriage, Muhammad was ordered by
God to carry out his duty as a Messenger to the whole of mankind.
It was in the Cave Hira' that he received the first revelation.
It might be out of context to mention the minute details of how and when Muhammad
received the revelation, but what matters here is how his beloved wife Khadijah
comforted and reassured him when he returned home after he received the first divine
revelation.
Trembling of awe as a result of the revelation he
received, Muhammad returned home, and told his wife what happened. Hearing him,
she comforted his soul with outstanding courage saying:
'By God, He will never forsake you. You extend ties of
kinship, say the truth, help the weak, show generosity to guests, and strive
hard to apply justice.'
We haven't witnessed a woman ever assuring her husband in
the same way Khadijah did. She managed to reassure her husband in the right
time and she instantly sought practical ways to achieve that by visiting her
cousin Waraqah who had knowledge of the People of the Book.
Later on, Waraqah appeased Muhammad's heart that this experience
he witnessed is shared only by Prophets and Messengers of God. It has been
reported that Khadijah was the first to proclaim her Islam.
She embraced Islam with no introduction or even a brief
inquiry about the new religion. The word hesitation finds no place in her
dictionary after she had witnessed her husband granted the honor of divine
revelation directly from God.
It is really rare to trace back how she became a Muslimah,
but a great number of Muslim historians state that she was the first member
from among both men and women to declare faith in Allah and His Messenger.
Others state that she was the first female to adopt Islam.
This latter view is the most famous one and it is the one followed by the
greatest majority of Muslims.
Khadijah lived as a very loyal and supporting wife to her husband (i.e. Muhammad) for more than nine years after the beginning of the revelation. She supported the Islamic mission with her money and was a source of comfort for her husband.
Khadijah lived as a very loyal and supporting wife to her husband (i.e. Muhammad) for more than nine years after the beginning of the revelation. She supported the Islamic mission with her money and was a source of comfort for her husband.
She respected her husband's meditations before the
revelations were sent to him, and later she supported him as a leader in his
community.
It is through this attitude of Khadijah that modern women,
irrespective of their faith, race, or location can draw fruitful lessons taking
Khadijah's way of treatment to Muhammad as an exemplar.
Modern women, who at many times tend to start a perfect
life may yearn to have a luxurious lifestyle and once they face the hardship of
reality, they may fail to face the first test.
Hence, learning from the heroine figure of Khadijah is necessary. She
stood behind her husband in his stressful moments, shared his sorrow before his
happiness, bore his burden before enjoying the moments of ease together.
Muhammad's Love to Khadijah
Muhammad remained loyal to Khadijah
a long time after her death
a long time after her death
Khadijah's Islam alleviated Muhammad's suffering, and
assured him the tranquility he was in need of at home. Khadijah played a great
role in granting her husband the necessary courage he had to adopt in order to
face both physical and psychological sufferings as a result of his divine
mission.
It is a role today's modern wives ought to learn from
Khadijah in order to help their husbands cope with modern challenges that
threaten the institution of family and threaten to target its very roots.
Muhammad remained loyal to Khadijah a long time after her
death, and it has been reported that he called the year she died as the 'Year
of Grief.' He used to praise her a lot in the presence of his other wives to
the extent that his wife 'Aishah said:
"I have never felt jealous from any woman except
Khadijah."
The Prophet used to mention her qualities a lot saying:
"She (Khadijah) believed in me while others rejected
my call. She affirmed my truthfulness when people called me a liar. She spent
her wealth to lighten the burden of my sorrow when others had forsaken
me." (At-Tirmidhi)
Muhammad even continued to honor her friends a long time
after her death as a sign of showing gratitude to her.
The Beloved Wife Passing Away
According to some Muslim historians, Khadijah died during
the month of Ramadan before the year of Muhammad's emigration to Madinah on the
'Year of Grief.' Muhammad was badly affected as a result of his wife's death
and it has been reported that he said while seeing his beloved dying: "How
heavy it is on myself to see such a scene."
He stayed many days in his home overwhelmed by sadness for
the death of Khadijah, the loyal and obedient wife with whom he stayed twenty
five years in love, dedication, patience, and commitment.
Finally, Khadijah's story of adopting Islam as a religion
and as a way of life remains a new living story from which men and women will
continue to have spiritual provision along the course of centuries.
Khadijah is a telling example by herself as a
non-believing lady who lived by morals and principles, as a wife who stood by
her husband in difficult times, as a believer who showed no hesitation to
accept the truth, and as a supporter to her new belief with different forms of personal
sacrifices.
Her example is one worthy of contemplation and imitation
by young women in our modern societies.
