Showering with One's Spouse - Islamic Guide To Sexual Relations

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OTHER CONTEMPORARY FORMS OF FOREPLAY

3) Showering with One's Spouse

It is permitted for a husband and wife to bathe and have a shower together as part of their intimacy and foreplay, because the spouses are allowed to look at each other's naked bodies, as discussed earlier. It is established that the Messenger of Allah (sa) bathed with his wives. Sayyida 'A'isha (r) relates:

"The Messenger of Allah "- and I used to take a bath from a single pot of water, and our hands used to go in the pot after each other in turn."  

(Sahih al-Bukhar'i 258)

The Messenger of Allah (sa) is also reported to have bathed with Maymuna and Umm Salama (r) Imam Tahaw'i (of the Hanafi School, Imam Qurtubi (of the Maliki School and Imam Nawaw'i of the Shafi'i School all relate the agreement of the scholars on the permissibility of a man bathing together with his wife from a single pot. (Al-Ta'liq al­Mumajjad 'ala Muwatta' Muhammad 1:142-244)

4) Sexually Provocative Dancing

As a general rule, dancing, sexually provocative or otherwise, is unlawful and sinful if accompanied by music. Listening to mainstream music is decisively prohibited according to all four Sunni schools of lslamic law, and results in many personal and societal ills.

Musical instruments designed exclusively for entertainment and dancing, and which are capable of captivating the listener, even when unaccompanied by the human voice, such as the drum, violin, guitar, fiddle, flute, lute, mandolin, harmonium and piano, are all prohibited to use and listen to. The only exception is the duff, a plain tambourine without jingles attached to it. This has generally been unanimously agreed upon since the era of the Companions (Sahaba), their followers (tabi’un), jurists (fuqaha) and scholars. (Bada'i al-Sana'i 6:269, Mughni al-Muhtaj 4:429 and Al-Mughni 12:39)

Sayyiduna Abu Malik al-Ash'ari (r) relates that he heard the Messenger of Allah (sa) say:

"There will appear people in my Umma, who will hold fornication, silk, alcohol and musical instruments to be lawful..." 

(Sahih al­Bukhari 5268)

There are numerous hadiths about the prohibition of music. Ibn Hajar al-Haytami, the Imam of the Shafi'i school (may Allah have mercy on him), gathered all these hadiths, approximately forty, in his excellent work Kaff al-Ra'a 'an Muharramat al-Lahw wa'l-Sama', and then said, "All of this is explicit and compelling textual evidence that musical instruments of all types are unlawful." (2:270)

As such, it is sinful for a wife to dance in any way to "music", since listening to music is prohibited. This prohibition remains, even if she is dancing for her husband's pleasure in the privacy of their own room.

As for dancing in front of one's spouse in private without music, this is allowed provided it is innocent and decent dancing (even if sensual or provocative), and not associated with the corrupt and immoral such as lap-dancing, pole-dancing and belly-dancing. A believer must avoid acts that are distinguishably those of the corrupt, immoral and shameless. (See: Mughni al-Muhtaj 4:573, Radd al-Muhtar 4:259-260 and Al-Fatawa al-hadithiyya P: 298)

The ruling on the husband and wife dancing together is the same, in that if it is accompanied by music, it is unlawful, and permitted without music, provided one avoids imitating the lewdness of those corrupt and immoral.

Source: Islamic Guide To Sexual Relations

To Be Continued....